So a little while ago I asked for advice on asking out a girl that I was already really close friends with. You were very helpful and it gave me the courage to finally do it. I don’t remember much of what happened because I got super anxious as soon as I started talking and felt like I was gonna throw up the whole time but basically she said she thinks it would be hard right now since school gets out at the end of April and we wouldn’t be able to see each other again until autumn (we’re both going home for the summer and live on opposite sides of the country) but that it could happen later. I’m not sure if she meant that but she also mentioned that one of our friends asked her if we were dating and she didn’t know what to tell him. Either way, she just wants to be friends right now which I’m totally cool with. I really like hanging out with her and one of the main reasons I was so hesitant to ask her out is because I didn’t want to lose our friendship if she didn’t feel the same way. Unfortunately, that may have happened. I might just be paranoid (as I tend to be) but it’s been three weeks since I asked her out and I haven’t seen her since. Every time I’ve asked her to hang out she’s said she’s busy with school work. That’s totally reasonable considering we’ve got finals and everything but normally when we’ve got a lot to do we just hang out and work together. I asked if she wanted to do that last week and never got a response. I asked if I had made things awkward between us and she said no but I’m not really sure that’s true and I haven’t had the proper chance to talk about it because like I said, I haven’t seen her in three weeks. What should I do at this point? Is there anything I can do? Am I just being paranoid?
(sorry about the length of this by the way)
Hello again! First of all, let me tell you that I’m proud of you for taking that step despite how anxious you were. It’s very brave and I’m glad you did it.
As for the girl, I can’t tell you for sure what she’s thinking but let’s not rush into conclusions here. You did just say that you guys have finals, true? So maybe she really is busy, although from personal experience I can tell that she may be also a little anxious herself about the entire thing and her first instinct is to avoid thinking about it for a while. I’m not saying it is what’s happening but it’s still a possibility.
My advice here is that you shouldn’t push too hard. Don’t insist too much or make her feel trapped, but at the same time let her see that you’re still trying to be her friend and act normally. Send her a text every now and then or as much as you used to, and if you think it’ll make her comfortable don’t bring up this subject again till after your final. And most importantly, try to keep in touch with her over summer.
I also think that I should remind that things don’t always work out, although I really hope they do for you, but it’s still a possibility and I don’t want you getting discouraged over it but keep that in mind. You sound like a good person, so stay confident anyway.
For now stick to what we said earlier and we’ll see how it goes. Do keep me updated, and if you need anything I’m here.
Good luck buddy x
3 days ago with 0 notes